Chapter 37: A Gentleman’s Dilemma

Shen Ti had already resolved not to have further contact with Feng Luoyi before their wedding. He did this to show not just others, but also himself, that he respected her.

He never expected Feng Luoyi would give him such a "surprise."

After returning to his residence and thinking things through, a maid came to report, "Master has returned."

Shen Ti had made his decision.

"Pack up my clothes and daily necessities and send them to the outer study. I’ll be living there from now on," he said.

The maid responded and asked, "How many days will you be staying?"

Knowing the duration would help her decide what to pack.

"Until next year," Shen Ti replied.

The maid was shocked. "What?"

In large households, the master's study was usually divided into an inner study and an outer study. Both could serve as places to work and rest. When a man said he was staying in his study, it usually referred to the inner study, which was more private and located in the inner courtyard—off-limits even to the wife.

The outer study, on the other hand, was more formal and business-oriented, and typically less comfortable.

Since Shen Ti specified the outer study, the maid assumed he had some official duties to handle and would be staying there only temporarily. Who would have thought he planned to stay until next year?

Next year? Was he planning to remain there until the new young mistress entered the household?

Shen Ti didn’t see the need to explain to a maid. His instructions were clear—she simply had to carry them out.

He then went to the main room to see his father.

After exchanging daily greetings, he reported on his first day at the Hanlin Academy: "The academician said I should first get familiar with Yutang for a few days before being scheduled into rotations."

The day itself had been uneventful—a typical first day for a newly appointed official. Shen Senior didn’t pay it much mind. It was Madam Shen, the mother, who was the most nervous and eager.

Ever since his grandparents passed away, their household had consisted of only the three of them. While in the capital, they always had dinner together.

Madam Shen came to call them: "Dinner is ready."

Father and son both got up and went to the front hall for the meal.

Just as they sat down and picked up their bowls, Madam Shen asked, "Why are you moving to the outer study? And planning to stay until next year?"

Shen Senior looked at Shen Ti in surprise.

He’d only had a brief conversation with his son earlier—how had the news already reached her?

With a mouthful of rice, Shen Ti slowly chewed and raised his eyes. "Since the engagement is set and Miss Feng is living in the inner courtyard, it wouldn’t be proper for me to remain there before the wedding. I’ll stay in the outer courtyard for the time being."

The outer courtyard was certainly less comfortable, but keeping distance before the marriage was something both his parents approved of.

Madam Shen hesitated to speak, glancing at her husband.

Shen Senior said, "That’s fine."

With that, the decision was finalized.

Madam Shen offered, "There are only male attendants in the outer study. Let Qiutong and Xiayin go serve you there."

The inner study had two maids, while the outer study only had male attendants and pages.

"No need," Shen Ti said. "The outer courtyard is frequented by men, and it wouldn’t be convenient for the maids. Male attendants will suffice."

"But those boys are careless and rough—nothing like the maids. They’ve long served you, and know your preferences."

"I used only male attendants during my years away, and I managed just fine. Besides, I’ve only been back a year and a half. What habits could they possibly know? These maids were just borrowed from Mother's rooms anyway."

"Mother," Shen Ti continued, "until the wedding, I’ll be staying in the outer courtyard. I won’t need the maids. Some of them are getting on in age—it’s time they were married off. Please handle their futures as you see fit. None of them need to stay."

Madam Shen was stunned. "Not a single one? How could that be?"

"I don’t need them."

"But someone needs to take care of your quarters."

"Then keep one of the younger ones. The rest can go."

Madam Shen couldn’t accept this. "Don’t be ridiculous. What about after you’re married? You can’t rely entirely on Shiniang’s people."

Shen Ti replied, "Once my cousin comes into the household, she can make her own selections."

Though he was close to his mother, he and Yin Zhi would need to be united in such matters.

Madam Shen tried to argue again, but Shen Senior intervened. "This is a small matter. Don’t quarrel over it—we’ll discuss it later."

He shut down the disagreement.

Shen Ti didn’t want to argue either. These were matters of the inner household. If his mother objected, then Yin Zhi could take care of it after she was married.

He would give her the status and life of a proper wife, and she would naturally have to take on the responsibilities as well.

The inner courtyard would be her domain.

With Shen Ti no longer insisting, it was Madam Shen who kept murmuring about it all the way until bedtime. "Day after day, always something going on… I don’t know what he’s thinking."

Turning around, she saw her husband leaning against the bed, an odd expression on his face.

Madam Shen blinked. "What are you laughing at?"

Shen Senior turned away. "I’m not laughing."

She climbed into bed and pinched him. "Spit it out!"

He finally relented. "Didn’t you notice why he dismissed all the maids?"

Madam Shen paused, confused.

Shen Senior explained plainly, "In the short time I spoke to him, you already knew everything happening in his courtyard."

Madam Shen froze. She finally understood. "He… he’s guarding against me?"

Shen Senior didn’t deny it.

Madam Shen was hurt. "I’m his own mother!"

She hadn’t done anything wrong—hadn’t interfered or overstepped—just cared about his daily life.

Why was he being so guarded?

She felt miserable, turning to lie on her side, her eyes reddening with grievance.

Shen Senior patted her to comfort her. "He’s grown up. No longer wants everything in his life watched over by elders. It’s natural—not just about you."

Madam Shen sniffled.

Shen Senior added, "It’s only the beginning. Once your niece becomes the new mistress, she’ll be running her own household. You’d best get used to it early."

Madam Shen shed silent tears.

Shen Senior reminded her, "Think about how things were when we first married—and my mother."

His own mother had suffered during their exile and returned with a ruined body.

When Madam Shen married into the family, most of the servants had been sent by various branches of the Shen clan—chaotic origins and divided loyalties.

Coming from a humble background, she had been ostracized by some of the other women in the clan. They both excluded her and spied on her.

Many of the servants were hereditary retainers of the Shen family, deeply entangled with various branches. Young and low-born, Madam Shen had been powerless against them.

In the end, it was the old Madam Shen who, despite her frail health, helped her clean house and build her own loyal retinue, allowing her to finally manage the household smoothly and protect her privacy and interests.

Thinking of those years, and her now-departed mother-in-law, Madam Shen wiped her tears and let out a long sigh.

Shen Senior asked with a smile, "Have you figured it out?"

"Mm." Madam Shen replied, melancholy in her voice. "He’s grown up. Already an official. I really shouldn’t meddle in everything anymore. Still… it’s hard not to feel sad."

For a mother, who gives life and watches a child grow, it’s inevitable to feel a hollow pain when the time comes to let go gracefully.

She sighed long and hard but finally found some peace.

The couple lay side by side, talking softly.

Even so, Madam Shen still defended her son: "Just yesterday we talked about watching him so he wouldn’t do anything improper before the wedding. And today, he thought of it all by himself. I didn’t say a word—it was all his idea. I only learned about it at dinner."

A man who can’t control himself around women will never achieve greatness.

Shen Senior was quietly pleased with this development, though he still gave a faint snort.

Madam Shen nudged him. "What are you still dissatisfied about?"

"When will he realize that Feng is no longer the same as before?" Shen Senior said coldly.

The Feng girl was now merely a government slave, yet Shen Ti still treated her like a gentlewoman. He was the one who moved out to avoid impropriety. What kind of nobleman does that for a servant?

Shen Senior bore no ill will toward Feng Luoyi. But he felt Shen Ti’s failure to recognize the shift in status and accept the reversal of fate showed a lack of maturity.

Let alone falling from official to slave—many years ago, his own father had barely survived exile. Countless officials had lost their lives. What had happened to their wives and daughters?

Such is life.

Madam Shen understood his meaning. "He just started his official career. Give him time. Most boys his age are still studying in academies."

She paused, then reminded him, "He has changed. Did you notice? Today, he referred to her as ‘Miss Feng’—but in the formal ‘Feng-shi.’ Before, he always called her ‘Miss Feng.’"

From “Miss Feng” to “Feng-shi”—a fall in status. If Feng Luoyi heard it, she’d probably cry again.

In that single shift of address, a little affection and pity remained, but the respect had been lost.

"Oh?" Shen Senior finally felt satisfied. "At last, he’s showing growth."

Men believed in being a kind mother but a strict father—love grandsons, not sons. Madam Shen always thought her husband was too hard on Shen Ti, especially when their son was already better than anyone else’s.

She giggled and gave him a playful shove.

He caught her soft hand.

Still in their thirties, the couple was in their prime—harmonious and happy, a loving marriage filled with joy.

Now that their son had entered officialdom, all that was left was to welcome the daughter-in-law and look forward to a grandchild.

Truly a picture of happiness.

The next day, when Shen Ti returned home after work, Madam Shen told him, "Qiutong and Xiayin from your courtyard are the oldest. We selected them last year to serve you because they’re calm and steady. Now that you no longer need them, I’ll arrange marriages for them."

Shen Ti nodded. "It’s my fault they were delayed. Please help choose good matches for them, Mother."

Madam Shen said, "No need for that. They were originally my people—I only lent them to you."

"As for the rest of the older maids, we won’t rush to reassign them," she added. "Let’s keep them until next year when Zhi-niang enters the household. She should choose for herself. It’s a chance to establish authority—and show generosity."

Shen Ti smiled. "Mother, you really do care for your niece."

She rolled her eyes. "The others can use them in the meantime. She’ll be coming into a completely unfamiliar place. There needs to be a transition. Once she’s settled, she can pick and train her own staff."

"You’re an official now. From now on, I won’t ask or meddle in your household matters anymore. Everything will be left to Zhi-niang."

Madam Shen had been comforted by her husband, and her expression was calm. But Shen Ti could still detect a faint trace of sadness in her voice.

He let out a long breath and bowed deeply. "Thank you, Mother."

This is what growing up is—step by step, taking authority back from one’s parents.

Becoming a full and independent version of oneself.